Being a switch can be extremely difficult for others when you’re meeting people and talking to people you have never met before. I have been involved in this lifestyle for the past couple of years just because I find a lot of different fetishes and kinks to be very exciting. So, I think a couple of the biggest drawbacks of being a switch is that a lot of the majority really are seeking one thing. They are seeking either someone that is going to be extremely dominant or someone that is going to be submissive.
For myself, I tend to have a constant battle with myself because there are so many times throughout the week when I want to be dominant and then there are some days when I just want to fully submit to someone else and let them have control. I think it comes down to what has been going on in my day and how relaxed or how crazy it has been. The busier I am, the more in control I want to be. I want to have everything in line and not have any surprises. I think the act of submitting to someone is something that should be handled with care rather you’re submitting with the intent of being someone’s submissive or rather you are in a DDLG relationship. Both are very serious relationships that you have with another person and I think that both require a lot of trust and passion.
I as a dominant however truly enjoy a relationship where were aware of our dynamic 24/7. There is such a high level of excitement while you’re at work or when you’re in public and you’re having those relations. It’s definitely one of the benefits of having that 24/7 relationship. One of the other benefits I enjoy is that you always know that you will have that person there for you whenever you need them. Rather somethings going on at 7 pm or you need them at 3 am because you can’t sleep, they will be there for you. That’s why I think there has to be so much passion and trust going forward into one of these relationships. There are drawbacks though, you tend to find a lot of people that are too busy or just don’t want to have that kind of commitment.
I on the other hand as a sub very much enjoy the level of obedience that comes with submitting. I amgenuinely so attracted to the idea of a strong woman in strong powerful positions. When I submit I like to have a girl who has a perfect understanding of true submission. I like having a lot of rules and guidelines throughout the day. I genuinely enjoy the level of pleasure that it brings to my owner or mistress from the actions that I perform for them.
I genuinely enjoy using KinkD because of the various options that it provides for users such as myself. It allows us to filter all kinds of different people in and out rather you're looking for someone in another state or if you’re looking for someone that is 5 miles from you. It also allows you to sort people by who was last online, closest to you and other nifty features. So with all that it’s relatively pretty easy to strike up a conversation with someone and find out what both of your interests are.
For me personally, I think the best way to communicate is by being straightforward. Telling each other what kinks turn you on, rather it’s squirting, high heels and skirts, or spanking or some other thing. That is also the reason I enjoy being a switch. I want to try everything. There is so much out there that seems to be so exciting and exhilarating that I want to experience some degree of it all.
Overall, I truly just being able to be whatever my other partner needs because at the end of the day, it comes down to if we were both satisfied. I know a lot of people that are amateurs think that people love being in control because of the power, but when you talk to anyone who has been in this industry for any length of time, you start to realize that it’s not about power. It’s about that level of trust and intimacy that you want to share with that person. Even for myself when I am in control, it’s not nearly about the fact that I can make you do whatever I want you to do. It’s about that connection that we have, that you trust me with every bone in your body to let me be your dominant and to have that strong relationship. Before anyone was ever considering going into a relationship such as this I would warn them to do their research. You may think just because you saw 50 shades of grey that you are ready for this type of relationship. However, that’s not the case, some of us who have interest in these types of fetishes and kinks want someone to experience that with and want to take it to a higher level.
Personally, I find every second of the relationship exhilarating because of the fact that you have no idea where that relationship can take you so quickly in a matter of seconds. I have met some of the most interesting people through different forms and variations of these kinds of relationships. Being a switch, however, you start to learn that sometimes people aren’t looking for that, they want someone that’s either going to be dominant all the time or someone that’s going to be submissive all of the time. So, I think that by far is the biggest drawback of being a switch because there are so many perks to being dominant and submissive and I have always wanted to experience both and I always fall into the crack. So hopefully you’ll be able to figure out what you are interested in, do your research and go out there and have fun!